Monday, March 19, 2012

Third trimester begins

photofromJenny

At the Mexico City anthropological museum in front of the Mayan calendar. I went with a couple ladies from Church.

As a follow up to my last couple of posts, I guess I should clarify that being pregnant is just about the most vulnerable I’ve ever been, which is a bit scary. Despite my best efforts, I can’t really control the outcome. That’s motherhood in a nutshell anyway, isn’t it? I could have an autistic baby, a mentally handicapped baby, a stillborn baby. I could freak out about my diet, sleep habits, toxins in my environment, and every odd change that goes on with my body. My first trimester was spent doing some of this. Especially as I wanted to doubt myself and our ability to continue our lifestyle which I love so much. And because I don’t know what it will be like to be a mom.

But I really believe this: depression is caused by living in the past…anxiety is caused by looking at the future…and peace is found by living in the present. By choosing to live in the present, do my best with what I can now,  and accept that if there are difficulties in the future I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it has helped my pregnancy be much easier.

1 comment:

Jordon&Andrea said...

wise words, Kalli. I love what you said about the past, present and future.

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