Saturday, March 10, 2012

My #1 Pregnancy Pet Peeve

I used to think it was funny to see the things pregnant women complained about. And I have to say the majority of them don’t bother me.

Things like, being asked if you’re carrying twins, wanting to touch the belly (although no one really asks me that I guess), commenting on belly size, getting advice for the future, etc.

For me, first runner up of things that rub me the wrong way is the joke cracking about how I probably have to pee because I’m pregnant. Or, if I do go to the bathroom, people say, “Of course she has to go! She’s pregnant, after all.”

For whatever reason, I am not going to the bathroom any more than I did before I was pregnant. It just so happens that I actually have to go to the bathroom, pregnant or not.

The thing that seems most universal and therefore what I have increasingly less patience with is the uber-sympathetic “How are you feeling?” I can get asked that as much as ten times per day. Notice the attachment of the word “feeling.” No one just says how are you anymore. It’s how are you feeling, as though they are expecting me to feel bad, when in actuality I feel completely normal. My first trimester I was very tired, it’s true, but after that I have been doing everything I normally do. To get such overwhelming sympathy all of the time would probably be nice if I didn’t feel well, but, I guess I’m lucky and pregnancy turns out to not be so bad. I used to get back aches worse than I do now, but Jacob found me this awesome adjustable desk so I don’t have to sit straight up while working.

As an extension of this is just the worrying people do in general, telling me things I shouldn’t be doing. If there’s one thing I seem to lose patience with, it’s people expressing anxiety about me. I know it’s meant well, but I do much better with people expressing confidence, support, or admiration. The only person I really like to say to me “I was worried about you,” is Jacob.

I’m hoping this is how adjusting to life with a baby will be as well. People have told me over and over the things I won’t be able to do once I have a baby. I want to be as get-up-and-go as ever. Public transportation, frequent flying, new languages, adventure activities—I want to keep doing them all and say—“What? It’s just a baby!” Just like now—I can do everything I could do before with maybe just a little extra huffing and puffing. So far I’ve hiked a volcano, moved to a new country, took 10 flights from the Caribbean to Central America to the US, attended Spanish school, mastered the Mexico City bus system, bargained for groceries in Mexican markets, moved up levels in the Kinect game Dance Central, and ran a couple product launches while pregnant. What? It’s just a little extra belly weight!

hiking guadeloupe

Guadeloupe in the Caribbean


The Elledges said...

I'm glad you're FEELING well :) I've know people who have to be in bed hooked to a drip 24/7 while pregnant

Jacob and Kalli Hiller said...

Me too. Well not hooked to a drip but on bedrest. I've heard girls are rougher pregnancies, maybe I'll get a chance to experience that and then love the sympathy.

Lauren said...

Number one, Congrats to you both! A new little person is so exciting to add to your family. Number two, way to go! It is that love of life and go get em attitude that makes pregnancy seem like no big deal.
I have confidence you will be able to do many fun and exciting things in the future with baby. In my opinion it is just a matter of getting a good baby carrier (I recommend Ergobaby because it carries a lot of weight, you can use different holds and it is ergonomic. People are always asking me if my boy is hurting my back and I love saying no I'm fine!) and trusting your gut.
Sure there are modifications to your adventures, but the adventures don't stop!! Way to be strong and optimistic!

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