Monday, October 8, 2012

Meditations on Travel and Motherhood: Traveler’s Guilt

This is a new one for me. I never felt guilt before for traveling. But now with Ryder it’s different. I don’t feel guilt at taking him around everywhere because of lack of stability or anything like that. He’s a baby. All he needs is his mom and dad, milk, and sleep.  I think it might even stretch his mind a little bit, to be held by people who speak different languages, to be exposed to different climates and ways of traveling—carseat, metro, taxi, airplane. But seeing so many family members hold him and love him and then to take him away during the period of life when he will change the most, that’s hard.

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My brother Regan with Ryder in Mexico City

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Ryder and Grandpa Al

But then I remind myself, even if we lived in the States, we have family in Utah, Iowa, Texas, and Missouri. We couldn’t be around all family, all of the time, even if we weren’t expats. The reality of modern life today is that most people don’t live right next to family these days, because work or school takes them across the nation. We are actually unusual in that we could choose to live where we wanted to in the States, but even then, some family would be missing out. And in some ways, because it’s important to us to see friends and family while we’re in the States, I think we make more of an effort to make that time special than people do who live closer by.

It’s still hard. No one loves my baby like family. Thank goodness for Skype.

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